Early Birds are for the Worms. Wait...what?

         I have always been semi-nocturnal.  Even after a long, tiresome day, night falls and – incorrectly – I come alive. I feel minor guilt over this.  It seems a responsible, adult decision to retire at 10:00 with the rest of the civilized world, then rise with the sun, renewed and refreshed.  Many claim night owl status, as do I, but I am unconvinced this is somehow “hardwired.”  It’s wrong to pawn off my decisions-turned-habits on some simple predilection, don't you think?  I secretly suspect I’m a morning person who just keeps going to bed too late.

         So although I often feel incapable of going to bed early, I know in my heart I could if I so chose. It’s lovely to be in charge of life’s little things.  Granted, I’m not always in complete control of my sleep patterns.  I’ve struggled with insomnia for many years now, and there are few things more frustrating than laying in bed completely exhausted, yet unable to rest.  I had a run in with my old, insufferable friend a few days ago. We stayed up all night together, watching the alarm clock flash like a neon sign burning into the night.

          Getting to bed late wouldn’t be such a problem if this were still college, where 8:00 classes were intentionally never taken.  These days my alarm sounds at the same inconvenient time every morning, and refuses to let me push snooze. If I resist waking, it will jump into bed with me, bounce on my stomach and demand cereal. I love the alarm, but would better engage with and enjoy it without the cloud of sleep deprivation clinging to me.

 

          Because you just can't think or operate when you're sleep-deprived. Circumstances lately have me up until 3am, and I am not handling life well. My brain functions at an impressively low capacity even under optimal conditions....so keeping my poor handicapped synapses in mind, I'm going to try to change. Ignore the fact I'm posting this past midnight. I may skip the worm, but this night owl is going to start retiring with the early birds.